INVINSIBILITY – SUPERMAN IS MIDDLE-AGED

Once upon a time we thought that superhero games, superhero fantasies and superhero ideations were just for the young. Once upon a time invinsibility was reserved for the young, and for those late teen / early twenties crowd. However once upon a time I used to think that Superman in any form wasn’t stupid or brain-dead – I guess I was wrong…

Alternative versions of Superman

Superman (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I was watching Ahkmal the other day and he was talking about how he used to feel so invinsible when he was a youngster, and it got me to thinking about my own powers of invinsibility.  I remember in my early years (and I am talking about the age of 8/9 years of age), we used to bounce out of bed with little to no prompting from my parents, dress and eat breakfast, before bounding out the door for the day. The only stipulation was that we behave (or they will tan our hides – shudder ow), and that we were to be home for dinner. They had no clear idea where we were, they had no idea whether we had taken a good lunch or enough water, they had no idea whether we had sun protection. I even got myself to school each morning after mum had done our lunches.  Now they were not bad parents, this was just how things were done when I was a kid. I had some amazing times and was far more self sufficient than some of the kids are these days (oh gosh I sound old).

Goodness me! My eldest is now heading into her 13th year and there is no way on Gods green earth she would even dream of that. At 8/9 I was still escorting her into the bathroom of public toilets to ensure she would be okay. At that age I was still walking her into her classroom. I shudder at the thought of her heading out the door to chill on her own with no parental supervision. Its not that I don’t trust her because frankly, she is a totally mature lass for her age and a real thinker, but I don’t trust everybody else. Not one day goes by that I am not reminded of Daniel Morcombe and his family endured. Not one day goes by that I don’t worry that she may fall victim to some smooth talking person, or the pressure from her peers. Totally unwarranted of course because she goes more against the grain than with it and doesn’t mind that she views things differently to her peers.

Don’t even get me started on my teen years – it is scary to think of what teenagers get up to nowadays (okay someone pass me my grey-away)! I remember going out driving with the older teenagers with licences and hanging out at the beach til 3am, I remember stopping at Hungry Jacks on the way back from the Gold Coast, and above all else I remember how stupidly naive I was about the fact that I was not what one calls invinsible. That didnt stop me from driving in the car with an older boy and our friends down a winding remote road with no street lights with our headlights turned off, with the only guiding light being a light post light a km or so away. I know I know…I have given myself the lecture many times since then – hindsight is far better huh.

What worries me about my own children is that they wont get to experience just a little of this invinsibility factor unless I encourage it a little.  Today my kids cant play without the constant thought of predators in the world. My kids have too much homework that needs to be done that eats into their leisure time with their parents.  We have to monitor so much more now including the television, social media etc and me being me am far more strict than other parents in our crowd – but I am totally ok with that.

But then you have the adult invinsibility. The kind that you shake your head at. The kind that you tsk tsk tsk at. The type that makes your mother ears spike. Yes folks its the eternal 40 year old teenager. Another thing that got me thinking on this topic was the “special” behaviour of these mid life crisis morons that put others at risk. We witnessed this at the beach on Sunday as multiple flash rips tore through one of the safest bits of coast on the Sunshine Coast. All up there were about 14 lifeguards coralling everyone between the narrowly placed flags and urging them to not go beyond their waist to avoid further rescues. Most of these lifeguards were mere babies themselves, so young and apparently fair game for the irrationality of the mid life morons. Despite these young ones asking nicely for these men to respect their requests, they ran past and dove out under wave after wave – until they got stuck! Yes they swam and swam and swam, with little to no gain toward the shoreline. And yes they had to be rescued, along with the young ones who had copied these mid life morons and went out too.

Mooloolaba Beach

Mooloolaba Beach (Photo credit: Wilson Loo)

It boils my blood to think that they couldn’t recognise that they weren’t in fact invinsible. My friend joked (I think? lol) that a law should be passed allowing life guards the right to b***chslap these morons. I kind of agree. So just a word of warning to anyone else who thinks they can jump off buildings, fly into space with only a prissy little cape, or has powers of great strength – dont swim when you are told not to because everyone will find out that man and moron doesnt mean the same thing!

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FRIENDS – DIAMONDS OR STICK ONS?

An previous post on friendships but sometimes it is good to revisit the lessons you have learnt – it can put a new perspective on many things. Friendships evolve and change over time and although we always think that friends are meant to be forever, everything in life is a season and some friends are not meant to remain in your life. Its all about complimenting each others personalities – are your friends diamonds or stick-ons? Read or revist this post and share your experiences on both.

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Everybody Be AWESOME!!!

TAM 🙂

THE WEE ONES ARE PRECIOUS

My girls are the loves of my life.

My girls are the loves of my life.

When I woke this morning I had a sense today was different. Kind of odd in a way you cannot articulate. I have these days of unease sometimes – but most of the time it will just happen that I will get a call that something is wrong with a loved one or friend, or I will find out something is wrong with a client. I dont know how but I just sense these things and one day I will go into futher details about this but for now I have a purpose to this post. Because this morning I woke, dressed for an expected long day at work, had breakfast, had some short but quality moments laughing with my husband and kids, and did some mamma bear stuff for the kidlets. Little did I know…..

So I start driving to work when I hear a comment or too, as vague as they were, about the Boston Marathon. As I drive to work I think to myself…yeah I still really want to do that Marathon – the gold standard of Marathons, that would just be awesome for Mr O-A and I to do together. Then I get to work and I hear the news and see it on the television playing in the surrounding area. “Bombs explode at finish line of Boston Marathon”. Oh dear and there it is…the sinking horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach, I just knew this morning that something sad or horrible had occured I just had to wait to find out what. How devastating, and sad, and frustrating, and horrible, and, well, how do you describe such a horrible thing. Then I see the captions at the bottom of the screen….”8yo child dies waiting for father to finish”….like a dagger in my gut – that poor kid. Cheering at the finish line. Eyes full of sparkling anticipation for his dad, his hero. Heart bursting with admiration for the most amazing man in his life. Mind overflowing with how he will one day grow up to be just as great. Boy oh boy how sad. Terribly terribly sad.

So my next post was going to be about how little ones are growing up so fast and how society seems to almost think its cute that these little ones are like mini-me’s, but I think that for today I am just going to talk about how precious our wee ones are. Because I am certain that when that little ones family awoke they certainly didnt realise what the day would hold for them. Again how sad.

Wee ones are special. I dont just mean special to their mothers and fathers. I mean really really special. To us, to society, to the future, to everyone. Wee ones hold within them that purity and innocence that we as a society should protect. But they also hold within them such amazing knowledge, and wisdom, and insight, that we tend to lose in our adult years. They seem to have an intuition and way of understanding that far surpasses what we give them credit for in their young years. We come to think as adults that although precious, these wee ones just dont have the ability to “get it” and thus we tend to coat real life, and hide from them the real world and their natural ability to figure it out.

My Two Miss's

My Two Miss’s

Each wee one is so totally special and unique, with something fantastic to offer the world. Which I guess is why I dont understand how people cannot appreciate their own children especially when they are young. For me, I really do cherish every moment with my girls, because they are not only my life but my reason for breathing each day, the reason I have acheived what I have, and the reason I have overcome the obstacles in my life. I see my children as my catalyst. They inspire me each day to be better and more awesome. For instance my girls have recently decided to go dairy free, all of their own accord, because they have learnt what happens in the current dairy industry. Understand that this is their choice, and as loving parents we are happy to support whatever they feel is their STAND in life, we will accomodate whatever they need to do this, as a family. As well as this my girls spend time in aged care facilities, and love every minute of it. They love nothing more that to spend time with the “grammas and grappas” (as Macca Moo calls them), and truly do respect that generation and all the valuable things they can teach them. They approach them with love, respect and understanding of their frailty. This does make me a very proud mamma.

What I dont understand also is how any sister, aunt, uncle, or other can fail to recognise this unique and special impact these wee ones have in our lives, and how what they do or dont do can tear that apart. I guess the girls are just blessed that I am like a bulldog and willing to fight for them even when everyone around us thinks I am being unfair.

Love my girl

Love my girl

Today in light of this tragedy, and despite that we think and feel this everyday – we hug our children and loved ones just a little bit tighter. We look straight into our wee ones eyes and tell her how much we love her. We hold our almost-teen and tell her how important and amazing she is to us and how much we love her.

We send our granddaughter and her mum and dad thoughts and prayers of love just as we do every other day. And we remember just how fleeting life is, and how you may not get a tomorrow to say you are sorry and to make things right with wee little ones. And then we thank God for taking care of us no matter what happens, and realise that the sun will rise tomorrow. We remember that lives will go on tomorrow, just as they already have. But we dont forget for one second that little boy waiting at a different finish line now for his mum and dad.Love and light to all who have been affected by this terrible thing.

Everybody Send AWESOME to Boston!!!

TAM XXX

ARE YOU A GRUMPY CAT?

Are you grumpy - or just happiness challenge. (Credit: google images)

Are you grumpy – or just happiness challenge. (Credit: google images)

Anyone who is anyone (ok, ok, anyone of facebook) has heard of, or seen “The Grumpy Cat“. In fact I think if you look at Grumpy Cats face you can almost see that one person in your life that continuously resembles this delightful *ahem* bundle of joy – and yes probably resembles the rest of us when we are at our worse, but thats all I’m admitting to!

The reason I am thinking about Grumpy Cat is entirely opposite to the thought bubble you have in your head right now but I wanted you to have an opposite point of reference. My real reason for this post is to share the exciting and amazing movie/doco that I saw on Friday night at our local university, and presented by Red Day Coaching before the rest of the world gets to see it. The movie I am talking about is called “HAPPY” I for one am entirely excited that I went.  I almost didnt go however, because I had ordered the tickets a while ago after my luncheon with Rachael Bermingham when she shared this great opportunity. So with my overloaded mother/wife/friend/nurse brain on, and still barely being able to function with a full on week of work and a healing tooth extraction – I had forgotten entirely that this screening was coming up. So when I got a text message from Red Day Coaching to remind me – I just thought what the hell! Mr Omni-Awesome was going to be at work until late so Miss Macca Moo and I had mamma and me time to do something together…and I managed to gather a few colleagues and friends to come too.

So basically, the HAPPY movie explored the infinite facets of happiness. It explored the views and experiences of people from all around the world from almost every walk of life (I really dislike that term, but at 230am in the morning – and the only time I have uninterupted quiet on school holidays – its all I could think of…but I digress) in relation to what happiness is and means to them. Interestingly it was those that had the least, or had endured the most, that were the happiest and seemingly had this happiness thing truly figured out. It appeared to just “be” with those people, which as a cancer victor and a “life happens” victor (I think I prefer to be victorious rather than just surviving), I really do get it. It is because of my life experiences and experience as a nurse that I can look at my own obstacles and still remain happy because there is so much in life to be greatful and truly happy about.

The movie totally ripped open the scientific truth of happiness as a relevant and proven method of improving life and wellness outcomes. Who says its illegal to take drugs? Give me some natural dopamine anyday! And boy did I hear nervous giggles of knowing from my dear dear friends sitting beside me when the comment arose in the movie that aerobic exercise was one of those things that increased this release of happy drug in our bodies (not to be confused with happy meals, I dont think McDonalds have natural dopamine in their *ahem* food). The science of happiness and all things happy and natural have really interested me since probably before my university training. But I remember focussing on these topics in an assignment/presentation on CAM therapies – complementary alternative therapies. But surprisingly what came through in the literature above CAMs such as acupuncture etc, was activities such as prayer, strong family connections, basically any activities that provided true joy and leave of worry for an individual.  And furthermore health providers are now being encouraged to provide strengths based approaches to the provision of care – meaning utilising the skills people innately have already. As was highlighted in this film by the Dalai Lama we are born with compassion in our blood, we have it our entire lives. So how can it be that we as a society has lost out compassion, how is it that we have lost our happiness?

It is highly devastating that society (much in the western world) is so caught up with being “super-sized successful”, “super-sized rich”, “super-sized everything”, that we have forgotten what we have right in front of us – HAPPY! JOY! LOVE! Instead we are teetering on the edge of KAROSHI – which in Australia can be termed “work yourself to death”. Yes, its a simple as that. This documentary brought to light something I had never even heard existed yet it is not only prevalent, it is something the Japanese are concerned about much of the time. And unless we start recognising that this method of working like a trojan is not working for us and is certainly not the type of world or legacy we want to leave to our children or grandchildren, then it bothers me that we are headed the same way.

So what do we do? Well this wonderful documentary showed a prime example of what we *should* be focussed on. You see in Bhutan, they have begun focussing on, measuring, and recognising the importance not of a gross national profit, but their gross national happiness. I am so excited about this because it means that somewhere in the world people are starting to focus on what is important. When everything is looked at simply there is one thing that YOU can do and that I can do to make the world change domino style – by making an individual choice each and every day to be happy, to do things that make you happy, to do things that make another happy, to chase your bliss. Happiness is like a really cool and awesome disease – so go out and spread that stuff everywhere!

Most people who know me know that I am sickeningly happy 99% of the time (unless you are withholding chocolate or telling me Im not allowed to go for my run, and then the only thing you will be worrying about is whether your legs are faster than mine!), and although I got it already and am working within my current job as a Nurse to implement FISH! Philosophy – there is always room to grown and learn. Let me say that when this movie comes out I will have the universe attending.

Unfortunately all pre screenings of HAPPY is finished but I hear that the movie will be released later in the year so stay tuned and I will update you all with details as they come through, so dont forget to follow me here or on facebook. And head over to Red Day Coaching for resources, coaching and business guidance. They have great vision and I will certainly be following them closely, awaiting the release of a program for teens – because personally I would like to get through my daughters teenage years with a few less than expected grey hairs, and just a snippet of my sanity.

Dont hold the HAPPY in - it could be dangerous! (Credit: google images)

Dont hold the HAPPY in – it could be dangerous! (Credit: google images)

So what makes you happy and why? How do you create your own happy each day? Share your stories and experiences of happy. Let us all in on your happy tips. Everybody Be AWESOMELY HAPPY!!! TAM 🙂 Ps. Head over to my facebook page My Infinite Balance, click like and join in the poll about being happy

AWESOMELESS

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This is my mantra today. Tomorrow. Tomorrow will be better…the sun will come out – tomorrow – so you gotta hang in til tomorrow…Ok enough Annie rendition. I have this issue with grinding my teeth, and this is terrible because you end up with cracked teeth. Some chiropractic fixed this however until I fell at work last year and the grinding when asleep started again. This in turn cracked my back molars so badly the nerves were exposed and giving me excrutiating pain. Not saveable so extraction x 2. Ouch!!! I was nervous but the dentist was great. But apparently my teeth are as stubborn and strong as I am and the buggered wouldn’t come out without a fight. Almost 2hrs, a very tired dentist and a depleted anesthetic supply later it was done. Turns out though because of the size of the roots and the fact that the roots invaded my sinus cavity (apparently can now lead to needing surgery), meant that he considers this a major surgical procedure and extreme care is required. What it also means is that it leave a work full of pain behind that nothing touches the side of. So yes. Today I am AWESOMELESS but…tomorrow, tommorow… Everybody Be AWESOME (and send some this way)!!! TAM 🙂