Let’s talk about step parents…I have one, I am one, and of course fairy tales are filled with them!
Once upon a time was Cinderella, and Snow White, and Sleeping Beauty. And these amazing Disney princesses were beautiful, wonderful, full of grace, and perfect beyond belief. We all want to be one of these princesses, they ooze all that is good in the world and since the dawn of time they have been the role model for all that is good and right in the world. They are the ultimate PRINCESSES.
In comes no other than “THE” EVIL STEP-MOTHER. Boooooooooo! Each one of these wicked women in Disney’s history has been propagated as full of malevolence, hatred, evil, malice, and wickedness. These are the women we are urged to hate, because they are portrayed to ooze all that is bad and wrong in the world. They are the ultimate EVIL STEP-MOTHERS.
What if all that was actually too black and white, and the story told from the view of someone less that joyful about the inclusion of this step-mother? What if the EVIL STEP-MOTHER was really just a woman trying to do the best she knew how to do, but it was like chinese whispers and was taken out of context? Chinese whispers are certainly a good example of how something good can turn into something bad because of misunderstandings and tunnel vision mentalities.
You see I am a step mother – although the word itself doesn’t sit well with me because I am not their mother, they already have one and I had no intention of taking over that role – I have my own kids to mother. But when two familys are brought together as one it isn’t always a smooth transition and in comes ESM role without a chance for anything else. I was warned that having a much older husband may bring these kinds of issues but we never dreamed it would have the impact it has had. All the same however I love my husband. Nothing will change that. And if the poo-poo hit the fan we would “be there” also. Nothing will change that.
As a parent however I will always strive towards GUIDING, NURTURING, PROTECTING AND EMPOWERING my children to ensure they are ready for the big bad world.
As a loving and responsible mother I endeavour to GUIDE my two wee ones in the direction of their lives. I will guide them with loving but firm direction towards their goals. As a loving and responsible mother I will NURTURE them. I will nurture them with the love and compassion that children deserve from their mother. As a loving and responsible mother I will PROTECT them. I will protect them from any physical, emotional or psychological trauma whether it be real, intentional or unintentional by whomever it is. As a loving and responsible mother I will EMPOWER them to lead an exceptional life and STAND for what is right. I will empower them through real compassion, love, honesty and earned trust, not to mention opportunities for growth and development.
You also see I have been a step child and I now am a step mother – so I have seen the two sides of the coin. I am also a mother to two daughters – so I have seen that too. I will continue to be a loving and responsible mother to my children, but I will also leave my mind open to changes in the future if that so happens – but for changes to be successful they have to be carried out with respect, honesty, compassion and integrity.
You never know what might happen. Maybe I should change the stigma on EVIL STEP-MOTHERS and write a book!!!
Everybody Step-up and Be AWESOME!!!